| ...... |
[23 Jul 2007|11:34pm] |
|
how easy it is to fall back into the same patterns of my past.
it may be fake happiness.
and it may only last for short times.
but it will always be around.
unlike people.
|
|
| ..... |
[22 Jul 2007|08:17pm] |
|
im at the point where i can't do anything. everytime i have a spare second to think to myself, i just seem to find myself thinking about my past. About how much better it seemed to be. Now, I know my life is pretty comfortable and at points I know i'm spoiled. But sometimes it seems like something is missing. I think maybe i need to work on myself. Just drop everything and just keep to myself. But i've done it before and it gets me nowhere.
All i'm doing now is temporarily stopping the feelings. For a few hours just letting it go. And i don't really mind at all. I don't care if I fall back into my past for awhile. And I know I don't care what anyone thinks about it. I can only do so much for people and caring what they think about me isn't one of them.
I have tried toooo hard with everyone. Trying to impress people and trying to make them like me. It's all bullshit. I can't make anyone give a fuck about me and i am done being fake.
end rant.
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|
| drugs. |
[19 Jul 2007|03:23pm] |
im going to be a better person.
just wait and see.
<3
|
|
| .... |
[17 Jul 2007|11:07pm] |
it feels nice.
to not have a care in the world.
to feel at peace.
its fucking wonderful.
|
|
| ... |
[14 Jul 2007|12:50am] |
|
now
i remember why it was so easy to get into drugs.
i remember why i wanted to do them all the time.
i remember how easy it was to just forget it all.
fuck.
|
|
| .. |
[13 Jul 2007|01:50am] |
i think i like lj. myspace is worthless. i can bitch here.
i won 50 bucks today. from a 2 dollar scratch off. i was stoked.
i have come to realize that guys will never treat me right. even when im not with them.
im giving it a break. its hopeless with me.
im exhausted with school and work.
but it seems when i go out, the parentals seem to get mad.
i guess im still not good enough. :/
|
|
| . |
[25 Jun 2007|10:42pm] |
i want to vent.
but there is not one person worth talking to.
i don't know what i am supposed to do anymore.
every single fucking day is the same really.
and its starting to get to me.
i want to do something with my life thats worth something.
and i don't want to give a fuck about you.
and after all this time, i can't pretend i dont care.
im not as strong as i pretend i can be.
[end vent]
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| new piercing |
[30 May 2005|08:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 aggravated |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
my chemical romance |
] |
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|
|
[14 Apr 2005|04:41pm] |
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fuck you sounds appropriate.
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concealed_smile's journal
bored